Thursday, June 12, 2008

Quotes Entirely Relevant to Consulting

"Consultant" as defined on Urban Dictionary:
1. Consultant
A man who knows 500 different ways to make love, but doesn't know any women.

The gov't. mistakenly hired a plethora of consultants to find a solution to the problem.

2. Consultant
Someone who borrows your watch to tell you the time, and then walks off with it

a consultant is a legitimate, occasionally usefull professional adivser [sic]
Associated words include: "conman," "buisness man," "nitting," "donkey punch" and "strawberry milkshake" [sic, again].

I dunno what 'nitting' is but 'donkey punch' and 'strawberry milkshake' are industry terms for "workforce efficiency optimization" and "strategic initiative diversification," respectively.

Credit where it's due: the Urban Dictionary posting was first discovered by pinko/enemy of capitalism/loyal reader Joyster, who is currently petitioning for political asylum in China.

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